National Day of Prayer

This year's theme is Psalms 91:2 "I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust."

What keeps going through my mind is:

"If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land." (2 Chronicles 7:14)

Fortunately, we can pray whatever our hearts desire and if it is His will, He will grant it:

1 John 5:
14. And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us:
15. And if we know that he hear us, whatsoever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we desired of him.

Because of the disasters all over the world as well as in the U.S., my prayer this year is for the healing of our land, air, and waters. I pray also for liberty and justice for all people, everywhere.

And, yes, of course, that "I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust."

Matthew 18:19. Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven.

Earth Day 2011

The only thing I'm going to say about Earth Day is to point out that after God created man, He gave him the job of taking care of his environment giving us the example that we need to be doing the same.

Only idiots and the ignorant destroy that which sustains their lives.

Genesis 2:15. And the Lord God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.

Visiting with a Friend

I had a funny experience on Facebook a few weeks ago when a friend now living in South Dakota was talking about her daughters' Girl Scout cookies.

Being facetious I asked, "Do you deliver?" and it turned out she was planning a trip close enough for me to drive over on a day trip to meet her. As it turned out, her husband came instead and we met for lunch last Thursday at the Red Lobster restaurant in one of the larger cities.

We talked about lots of stuff from the last time he ate at Red Lobster (when he proposed to his wife on her birthday) to driving in San Francisco (We agreed the thing to do is not drive - park your car and use the excellent public transportation to get around instead.) & L.A. to our beliefs and how some people like to ignore the scripture and make God out to be what they want Him to be, in effect, turning Him into a man-made god. Our backgrounds are different, but we're pretty close in many of our beliefs when we're not spot on. He gave me some things to look into the Bible about and I believe he got some from me, too.

Somehow, our conversation inspired some changes I've been wanting to do on my websites and I've been busy incorporating them. One has to do with the copyright notice. I had made one using JavaScript which makes it maintenance-free for me, but part of it won't show up if visitors don't have JavaScript enabled in their browsers.

Another modification is to change a drop-down menu into an include file so I won't have to upload all the other pages whenever I add a new page. By using an include file, all I have to do is upload the edited drop-down menu and the new webpage.

Suddenly, it dawned on me. Putting my copyright notice into an include file will solve the issue. I'll have to edit and upload only one little file one time each year I modify my websites and it won't matter if visitors have JavaScript enabled or not.

Whoo-hoo!

Cabin Fever

It's overcast and cold which is to be expected of February.

Imagining myself outside flying a kite under a warm, blue sky, I think of things I want to do, need to do, could and should do. They range from going through mail to shopping for new clothes to (re)learning French, German, and Spanish because I want to travel, to redesigning my websites. Yesterday, I tried a couple of color schemes.

Reconnecting with a past president of my former writers group whose memoir chapbook is scheduled to be published next year, reminded me that I need to learn how to use the aids I've acquired to market my own books which I have to actually finish writing first in order to get published.

The horse goes before the cart.

Honestly, I have so much to do, I don't see how I'll ever die.

If only life worked that way for everyone.

James 4:
13. Go to now, ye that say, To day or to morrow we will go into such a city, and continue there a year, and buy and sell, and get gain:
14. Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.
15. For that ye ought to say, If the Lord will, we shall live, and do this, or that.

Death of a Liar

I feel odd.

Over five years ago, my ringing phone awakened me from a nap. It was an attorney in another state dunning me to pay on my credit card.

Being sleepy, my first reaction was fear that I had forgotten to make my payment on time. Then, I realized that the company would have added a late payment fee onto my next statement and wouldn't have sicced a collector onto me until I missed several payments. That this was an attorney meant the situation was serious.

Gradually more alert as minutes ticked away, I began arguing with the attorney. I wasn't the one she was after. She had the right phone number, but the wrong location, wrong occupation, wrong Social Security number, wrong spousal information, and wrong everything else because she was talking to the wrong person. I didn't even have the credit card she was calling about.

After she apologized for disturbing me and hung up, I started pulling pieces together from things I recalled seeing on the Internet about a person fitting what the attorney said was supposed to have been about me. Spending a few minutes to verify my memory and find a phone number, I used my Caller-ID to call the attorney back and gave her the other person's phone number saying, "Try this number."

She thanked me and was curious as to why I tracked it down for her and from where I got it.

I replied, "Because I hate lying deadbeats and remembered I saw it before on Yahoo."

The reason I feel odd now is because while searching for something else on Google, I discovered that the person who had apparently given out my phone number to avoid collection calls back then was a member of the First Baptist Church in her town. From her photo, she was a nice, responsible woman like my deadbeat aunt who also attends church albeit Lutheran in a different state.

The sad part is that I ran across the information about her being a member of the Baptist church in her obituary online. I wish I could ask her, as a Christian, whatever in the world made her think she could put my phone number on her credit card account as if it were her own and get away with it? It wasn't a mistake. The numbers are much too different for it to have been a typographical error.

I hope she repented.

Psalms 37:21. The wicked borroweth, and payeth not again

Revelation 21:8. But the fearful, and unbelieving, and abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.

Go to Now

Today, I'm finally getting back to what I thought I'd be doing before I was so rudely interrupted by the revelation that spammers have been using one of my domain name email addresses to forge their headers.

Such is life: God's will, God's way, God's timing.

Or, as I've heard it said in this part of the country, "...Lord willing and the creeks don't rise."

James 4:

13. Go to now, ye that say, To day or to morrow we will go into such a city, and continue there a year, and buy and sell, and get gain:
14. Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.
15. For that ye ought to say, If the Lord will, we shall live, and do this, or that.

Eye for Eye

Since the 1982 movie, Gandhi, a version of a quote attributed but never actually sourced to Mahatma Gandhi has been floating around:

"'An eye for an eye, tooth for tooth' leaves the whole world blind and toothless."

I pretty well ignored it, feeling that it was mocking God, until I saw an episode of a TV series recently that had a Jewish man say that scripture is about money.

"It is?" My attention was caught.

I looked it up and to my surprise, of the four references in the Bible, only one is about justice in general.

The first reference, Exodus 21:22-25, is about being careful around women, specifically a pregnant woman. It's saying that men can't cause harm to an expectant mother either on purpose or inadvertently.

It says that an unborn child is precious and the father will determine the amount of the fine as punishment for causing the miscarriage and judges shall determine how it shall be paid.

It also says that should the mother be injured, the person who injured her will receive the same injury. He will have to endure the result of the same injury he caused her to bear.

How good God is to have a law ensuring an expectant mother and her unborn child won't be harmed by instituting consequences if they are.

How sad it is that men were so disrespectful of women and children that such a law had to be written.

How sad it is that after all this time, there are still people today who don't value women, motherhood, or unborn children.

The second reference, Leviticus 24:17-20, says that someone cannot kill or physically harm someone else without being put to death or receiving the same bodily harm as punishment. I believe this is the scripture used for general retribution. However, I see it not as leaving the whole world blind and toothless, but as a deterrent. How many people would purposely kill or injure another person knowing that they will be put to death or receive the same injury? That's like putting out your own eye. It simply isn't believable that people would do that to themselves.

The third reference, Deuteronomy 19:16-21, is about a false witness who lies with the intention of causing harm to someone else. The harmful judgment the victim was meant to get is to be the liar's punishment. This scripture is to discourage people from framing others and to discourage lying.

The fourth reference, Matthew 5:14-16, 38-48; is the most interesting because Jesus tells His followers that we are no longer like everybody else, but that we are the light of the world. In our new position, we are to treat everyone as God does, with love.

Do we do that?

If we do, with the wisdom that the Lord gives us, don't some non-believers, and so-called Christians, too, misinterpret our obedience and trust in Him as weakness and try to take advantage of us? After all, they don't know God or understand that our turning the other cheek or going the extra mile is done out of strength.

Because we already know how the story ends.

A Matter of Balance

The Tiger Woods situation has some people arguing that adultery is a private issue between a husband and his wife. This post takes a look at two scriptures that have been used by those who think the media and everyone else should be quiet about Tiger's infidelities.

One scripture, "...He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone..." seems appropriate because Jesus said it in a passage about a woman caught in adultery:

John 8:
2. And early in the morning he came again into the temple, and all the people came unto him; and he sat down, and taught them.
3. And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst,
4. They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act.
5. Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?
6. This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not.
7. So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.
8. And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.
9. And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.
10. When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?
11. She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

The problem with trying to use it to convince others to leave Tiger alone is that doing so misapplies the verse; no one has condemned Tiger to death. No where does Jesus say that the adulteress shouldn't have been exposed as such, only that he without sin should be the one to begin her execution which has never been an issue in Tiger's situation.

Moreover, the passage shows that public exposure was the path to God's mercy and the woman's repentance just as public exposure was the path to Tiger Woods' reluctant but eventual statement of guilt and intended repentance.

The other scripture is, "Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye?" (Matthew 7:4).

Frankly, I'm appalled that anyone would trivialize breaking the Seventh Commandment (Exodus 20:14) by equating adultery to a mote (speck). What then, considering that the Commandments aren't ranked by magnitude, might be equated to a beam?

In defense, a more appropriate verse is likely, "Judge not, that ye be not judged," from the same passage in Matthew 7:

1. Judge not, that ye be not judged.
2. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
3. And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?
4. Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye?
5. Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.

The problem with using this passage is that because God doesn't see any sin as being worse than another as we might see murder as being worse than stealing, and there's a distinct comparison of magnitudes in this passage, this scripture isn't about sins but is about the non-sinful things some may criticize or think they need to help other people fix about themselves.

Also countering the erroneous belief that "Judge not, that ye be not judged," is about sins is that Jesus instructed us to "Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment" (John 7:24).

Even so, we weren't given much of an opportunity to judge Tiger because his lovers began confirming his infidelities within a few days and God has already judged adulterers:

1 Corinthians 6:
9. Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,
10. Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.

The fact is that Tiger's philandering has been the worst kept secret and the media has known about it for a long time without printing a word.

What changed?

When Tiger crashed his vehicle, the accident became a matter of public record. The public wants to know how and why accidents happen as well as if people were injured or property damaged and to what extent. It's the media's job to keep the public informed. Reporting accidents also helps keep the public safe because it's the easiest way for us to learn what to do or not do.

After that, it's simple back-tracking from the accident to its underlying cause: Accident -> reckless driving -> upset over argument with Elin -> his texting Rachel Uchitel -> adultery. Thus, Pandora's box was opened.

Another reason adultery shouldn't be a private matter is because such a violation of the Ten Commandments erodes the fabric of society which is everyone's concern. Too often, silence is interpreted as consent and in no way should we ever allow anyone who breaks the interpersonal Commandments the illusion that s/he's behavior has gone unnoticed or will be without consequence. While a person not in the public eye deserves the attention of family, friends, associates, and church; a public figure who travels the world needs the watchful eye of the public to hold him or her accountable especially after years of concealing the behavior from the public has failed to effect a change.

Although we've all heard or read about how intrusive the media can be in regard to the personal lives of celebrities, especially the tabloids - and I do not condone the excess or the fabrications - however uncomfortable it may be, the situation is one that Tiger Woods brought upon himself.

By committing adultery, he proved himself to be immoral.

By texting Rachel where Elin could catch him at it, he displayed poor judgment.

By blaming Elin for ruining their Thanksgiving, he exposed himself as a blame-shifter.

By driving recklessly, he unleashed the media.

While I'm sure those who use the two scriptures examined here think they have the best intentions, taking scripture out of context and picking scriptures to the exclusion of others in the Bible leaves them on the slippery slope of using the Bible to say whatever they want it to say instead of having a balanced outlook of the scripture.

Everyone else needs to be aware that since there is what people say the Bible says versus what the Bible actually says, they need to study the Bible for themselves.

Tiger Woods is a great golfer, but not a good man and it's better for us to see him as he really is than it is to hold an unbalanced view of him as being like the other celebrities who manage their lives without engaging in the scandalous behavior that Tiger has.

If Tiger's lucky, having his adultery exposed publicly, like the adulteress in the Bible, resulted in true repentance rather than mere lip service and the painful memory of his exposure will keep him from behaving badly in the future.

Joy by the Water

I decided to change my blog's title from "Sound Off!" that I started using in 1999 when I emailed my first rant to various people about how the millennium wasn't starting in 2000 but in 2001, despite the worldwide celebration by those who evidently didn't know how to count from one to a thousand.

I'm going with my name since it is a good name and has served me well over the years. I also like the symbolism, both spiritually and geographically.

"Gail" means "joy" in Aramaic.

"Rhea" in the original spelling means "by the water" in Irish.

Thus, my name means "Joy by the Water" and it is true.

"The Lord is my shepherd..." (Psalm 23:1)

Baa-aa-aa!

Becky

Having an urge for ribs all week, I hopped down to the nearest supermarket yesterday to take advantage of the deli's Friday special on ribs.

Placing the ribs in my cart, I rolled it to the back of the store to see what was available on the other hot table before proceeding to pick up toothpaste, margarine, and raisin bread.

Not seeing my favorite cashier, I looked for the shortest check-out line, unloaded my groceries on the conveyor belt, and swiped my card while Becky, the cashier, scanned my purchases.

Bagging my bread and toothpaste in one bag, she put the ribs into a second bag and the hot vegetables into a third.

"That bag is ripped," I said indicating the bag holding the ribs.

Becky turned the bag to see the split and put the margarine into the bag with the container of hot vegetables.

"Please don't do that!"

Her hand froze and she looked at me.

"You're putting cold food next to hot," I explained. Unreal. Doesn't she know any better than that? The vegetables will have the margarine melted before I get home.

She moved the margarine to the bag with the bread and toothpaste. Then, she put the ribs into a new bag.

"$23.22," she said after totaling my bill.

I waited.

She waited.

"$23.22," she repeated.

"My screen says it's waiting on you," I replied, not used to having a cashier who doesn't pay attention to her screen.

"Did you swipe your card?" Becky asked.

"Yes."

She looked at her screen and pressed a button. "Debit or credit?"

"I pressed the credit button," I said, thinking she obviously wasn't paying attention to her screen again as I began picking up my bags.

As Becky handed me my receipt, the previous customer returned saying that she didn't get her change.

"I remember you handing me the receipt, but not the money and I can't find it anywhere," she said.

I did that a few months ago at Wal-Mart and had to wait until the next day for the cashier to finish her shift, close out her drawer and do her count before I was able to receive my money. I worried that it might be only my word against hers if the cashier decided to pocket my money for herself, but the Customer Service representative said they could also check the video tape to see if I was handed my cash back or not. I don't know if this supermarket has cameras everywhere like Wal-Mart does, so it might be more of a mess to fix.

I was glad it wasn't me.

I left the store, still incredulous that Becky put my margarine in with the hot vegetables. What was she thinking?

Was she thinking?

Upon reflection, remembering how she wasn't paying attention to her screen and that she may not have given the previous customer her change, I decided that Becky was distracted by something else going on in her life and is more in need of my prayers than my criticism.

I invite you to pray for her, too.

Child of the Light or Member of the World?

Thelma, my aunt-through-marriage, owes me money.

Following the steps of Matthew 18:15-17,

(Matthew 18:
15. Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.
16. But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.
17. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.)

in 2006, I took the issue to her pastor, Paul Anderson, of the Zion Lutheran Church in Fairfield, WA who agreed that I was doing the right thing. He asked what kind of reaction he might expect from her when he talks to her and if he may show her the letter I had written documenting her behavior in avoiding to pay me. I gave my permission since she already knows what she's done.

But, he never spoke to her nor did he gather a group of church members to talk to her. Granted, she winters in Mesa, AZ but still, he's had time enough and then some.

As a result, last month I wrote a letter of complaint to his bishop, Martin D. Wells, of the Eastern Washington-Idaho Synod located in Spokane, WA.

If I'm generous, I'll say that Wells is apparently ignorant of 1 Corinthians 6:1-7 that says we are not to go to court against one another but to resolve issues within the church.

(1 Corinthians 6:
1. Dare any of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unjust, and not before the saints?...
7. Now therefore there is utterly a fault among you, because ye go to law one with another...)

However, ignoring Matthew 18:17 that I quoted in my letter to him, Bishop Wells replied:

"...You are attempting to use his sacred influence with a parishioner to get something you want from that parishioner...

Your recourse is through the courts. Please leave Pastor Anderson out of this matter... Please fight your own fight and leave this pastor out of your triangulation."

Yes, I wrote back, challenging the bishop with a dozen questions and scripture verses that I pray will prick his conscience and lead him to repent. Since the letter went out with yesterday's mail, his reaction remains to be seen.

However, for a person to be in church, a church leader for as long as Wells has been, and a bishop at that, to instruct anyone to do precisely what the Bible says not to do, is the antithesis of Christianity. Telling me to disobey God is an action of Satan's servant, not a servant of Christ.

Harsh words? Or am I calling it as it is?

Now, here's the point to this post:

If church leadership ignores the Bible in favor of the ways of the world, is it any wonder that Christians can't be distinguished as being Christians or as being any different from members of the world?

Since we can read the Bible for ourselves and have the Holy Spirit to guide us if we're willing to be led by Him, our worldly behavior isn't excused because church leadership erroneously says it's okay or ignores it since we are responsible for our own relationship with the Lord.

So, if you call yourself a Christian, what practices do you engage in that make you look like a member of the world?

Why don't you stop?

I hope it isn't because you love the world and its ways more than you appreciate the Lord who was crucified for us.

Rude Spouses

The mind works in interesting ways. Between the receptionist I mentioned in my last post and the Ft. Hood shootings this week, memories came up of two incredibly rude spouses I've met.

The first was when I was living in Killeen, just outside Ft. Hood, and working in Temple, Texas. My supervisor had invited me to a dinner party that he and his wife were having at their home in Temple.

When I arrived, I discovered that I was the only guest from his work. The others were her college friends. Nevertheless, I had a good time.

When it came time for me to leave, I went to say good-bye to the wife.

"Thank you for inviting me," I said.

She looked at me coldly and replied, "I didn't invite you," then walked away.

Wow.

Technically, though, she was right. She hadn't invited me.

The second rude spouse was encountered last year. A former co-worker had invited me to join her and her husband for a pleasant afternoon flying kites on their acreage. Since he is the kite aficionado, I was telling him something I learned from enthusiasts I met who belong to the San Diego Kite Club. His wife was behind me, about six feet away.

And he walked away, entering their house.

Yes, just like that. While I was speaking, right in front of him, without any sort of, "Excuse me," or gesture to warn me.

Amazing. I bet he didn't do that to people when he was trying to get elected to public office.

What's even more appalling is that these spouses call themselves, "Christians."

So much for their practicing the Golden Rule.

I'm glad rude spouses are few and far between.

Luke 6:31. And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise.

Bell's Palsy or Stroke?

The pizza arrived at 7:30 P.M. on the Wednesday before last. I relaxed, watching TV and sipping water until I had an urge for a box of vanilla milk shortly after midnight.

But the left side of my mouth couldn't close around the straw.

I started to freak. Had I had a stroke?

I checked myself to see what else was different and prayed, "Lord, did I have a stroke? What do I do? What is it?"

The answer came back, "Bell's Palsy," in that still, small voice within my spirit.

Wanting to make sure it wasn't a stroke, I got on the Internet. Everything I read at the Mayo Clinic, MedlinePlus, the Merck Manual, WebMD, and other sites Google gave me said to go to an emergency room immediately. Feeling a check in my spirit for that course of action, I continued to study the pages and was gradually reassured.

Men are the usual victims. I have no family history of stroke or heart disease. I'm younger than the typical age range of those women who did have a stroke. I've never been diagnosed with hypertension. Most of all, stroke affects the lower left part of the face and is usually accompanied by the left arm and/or left leg being affected as well, while Bell's Palsy affects an entire side of the face, only, from forehead down, and from nose to ear.

Wondering what might have caused it, I checked the web sites for Bell's Palsy before calling my chiropractor for an adjustment. Everything fit.

However, my D.C., said there wasn't anything he could adjust to fix Bell's Palsy and he wasn't about to adjust my neck, anyway, because he didn't know that it wasn't a stroke and didn't want to make it worse, if it was.

Fair enough.

On Monday, I called my regular M.D. for an appointment to get an official diagnosis for Bell's Palsy. However, because of him taking time off, his appointment book is full until Nov. 10. The nurse asked a series of questions and relayed them to the doctor. When his answer came back, it was that he'll see me on Nov. 10th and if I wanted to get checked out sooner, I may go to the walk-in clinic he named.

Off like a shot, I arrived at the walk-in clinic and was given a five-page intake form to complete that inconsiderate, partial idiots must have designed. For example, instead of allergies to medicines being filled in on page 1 where doctors like it for quick reference so they don't prescribe something that'll kill their patients, allergies were to be listed on page 2...and page 4.

What the...?!

Yes, allergies were to be listed on page 2 and listed again on page 4 with the reactions. If I had been smart, I would have reviewed all five pages before starting to complete the form so I could list them on page 4 that wanted more information about the allergies and enter "See page 4" on page 2. But I didn't have that foresight.

Returning the clipboard to the receptionist, she reviewed my pages. "You didn't do this section," she said about the two-inch square box I had left blank.

I didn't appreciate her tone of voice. Was she copping an attitude with me?

"I didn't understand it," I replied.

"It's your Family History." She read, "Father/Mother/Grandparents/ Brother/Sister..."

Yup, she had an attitude.

"I know that," I sniped back. "It's all those initials that I didn't understand."

"Oh!" She went on to interpret:

Heart disease.

(No.)

Stroke.

(No.)

Cancer.

(That must be the "CA" that I saw; the others still didn't make any sense to me.)

"You didn't sign this," she said in a better tone of voice, pointing to a signature block on the last page.

"Sorry, I don't sign for things I haven't received," I said.

She handed me a privacy policy statement and I signed, acknowledging receipt.

Sitting back down to wait, I couldn't get into "Judge Alex" on the TV although the case sounded really funny. What would Jesus do about this twit of a receptionist and the stupidly designed intake form? There are people who definitely should not be interfacing with the public and I don't subscribe to the "Turn the other cheek" philosophy because it's for a conquered people of which I am definitely not a member. Him raging in righteous anger seems more like it except flinging the receptionist's papers about and driving her out with a whip of cords (John 2:15) would be drastic overkill as well as get me arrested for assault.

One of my college professors who taught computer programming also functioned as a group therapist after hours. We had gotten close enough for her to invite me to Christmas dinner and one year she advised, "I can be angry and you can be angry, but it's a lot better for me if you're the one who's angry," as a way to deal with aggravating people.

Thinking about her advice, maybe I should have put the monkey on their backs by filling the Family History block with "NTIKOBIDUTFLAADKFWYL" ("None That I Know Of Because I Don't Understand The Freaky Little Abbreviations And Don't Know For What You're Looking") and let them sort it out.

Before I could calm down, the nurse called me in and took my blood pressure: 208/103.

The doctor saw me immediately.

After I explained what happened the week before and finished with what my doctor said that morning, the young East Indian doctor said, "You can't diagnose Bell's Palsy over the phone and with your high blood pressure, I'm concerned you may have had a stroke. I'm going to send you over to the county hospital emergency room and they'll do CT scans and an MRI..."

"To diagnose a stroke," I interjected having learned that from my research. You can't treat a stroke by yourself because it may be caused by either bleeding or a clot and incorrectly treating one will accelerate the other that actually caused the stroke and make things worse.

"No, to diagnose Bell's Palsy," she lied, not knowing that I already knew how Bell's Palsy is diagnosed.

I kept silent. I don't know what her background is, but she was sounding a lot like a couple of doctors who left the Canadian health care system to practice here in the U.S. who did nothing but prolong my pain some years ago. The first was a French Canadian orthopedic surgeon who ordered chest(!) X-rays when my hands suffered from carpal tunnel syndrome, a worker's comp case. I switched to another doctor, an American Chinese, as soon as I could.

The second was a few years after that, an English Canadian HMO (spit!) family practitioner who ordered three MRIs with a prescription for a narcotic when all I needed was a $35 chiropractic adjustment that I finally went and got for myself out of the network. After that, I immediately submitted paperwork to change to an American Hispanic doctor whom I'm still with although I'm no longer in an HMO.

The walk-in clinic doctor continued, "I'll call over so they'll expect you and we'll get an ambulance to take you there."

An ambulance to go two blocks? I don't think so! The one time I needed an ambulance, it cost me $400 and my PPO insurance didn't pay any of it.

"The problem with an ambulance is that I'll be over there and my car will be over here," I hedged.

"Do you have a friend that can get it for you?"

"No," I lied back at her. Bad form, I know, but expedient since I wasn't going to discuss my finances with her nor let her argue with me.

She had me sign a waiver for the ambulance and sent me on my way after making me promise to go straight to the emergency room. On my charge sheet, she had written "N/C" for no charge and "Bell's Palsy" for the diagnosis.

So, diagnosing Bell's Palsy needs CT scans and an MRI?

No, she had manipulated me because, my guess is, she didn't want me stroking out in her little clinic. At least, I didn't have to pay anything. I never did mention the receptionist nor the form.

At the hospital's triage station, I was relieved to see that their form was done right. Allergies to medicines right in front, up top. For complaint, I entered, "Referred by [name of walk-in clinic]: Bell's Palsy or stroke? High blood pressure."

I was seen right away. Blood pressure: 156/106.

After the doctor had me wrinkle my forehead and nose, smile and frown, check my eyes and ears, etc., he diagnosed Bell's Palsy, gave me a prescription, and instructed me to keep my appointment with my regular doctor on Nov. 10 for follow-up. No CT scans. No MRI.

Hah! Evidently, Bell's Palsy CAN be diagnosed over the phone if the right questions are asked.

About my blood pressure going over 200? "The 156 isn't alarming and blood pressure fluctuates, but you should discuss it with your doctor if you're worried about it," he said.

While waiting to get my prescription filled at Wal-Mart, I used the blood pressure check station that's next to the pharmacy: 149/85.

After I was done shopping, I checked again: 117/96.

Good.

As far as the Bell's Palsy goes, the cause is unknown. The facial nerve (Cranial nerve VII) passes through a tiny channel (facial canal) through the facial bone. The nerve gets inflamed which pinches it and causes paralysis on the side of the face where it is located. Most people recover spontaneously within a few days to six months. Some recover in a year. A few never recover. Corticosteroids such as Prednisone are believed to speed recovery.

The major concern is that without a full blink and not being able to close my eye (other people may not be able to open the affected eye), it may dehydrate and sustain permanent damage. My Rx included over-the-counter (OTC) eye drops for the day and an OTC ointment for while I sleep to ensure protection and hydration.

Living with it is inconvenient and awkward, but bearable as long as I don't have to talk too much since I can't enunciate as clearly as before.

The doctor also prescribed an eye patch to keep my eye closed while I sleep. The nurse recommended using paper tape instead. The nurse was right. The eye patch doesn't keep my eye closed although it does protect my eye from dust and other flying objects since I can't blink or close my eye to protect it while I'm out and about.

The moral of this story? At this point, I'm not really sure. All I can say is that I'm getting more prejudiced against non-American doctors who are practicing in the U.S. and know only that God doesn't lie.

Of that, I'm utterly convinced.

Strike One!

After the luncheon and fashion show last Saturday, my friend and I went to a park to sit and relax and visit while watching a couple of my kites fly.

At the end of our visit, when we were discussing eliminating unsuitable prospective mates, I said, "Three strikes, he's out."

She said she's proud of me because other women she's known say, "One strike, he's out."

We agreed that isn't fair because nobody's perfect and a good man might be cut because of a single mistake. In the days since, however, I've decided that "One strike, he's out," is a valid and necessary rule:

1. If he hits, kicks, chokes, or compels her to have sex against her will. This would be a no-brainer except for the fact that there are women who make excuses for or accept excuses from men who physically or sexually abuse them.

2. If he does drugs or engages in other illegal activities or tries to persuade her to do the same. This is another supposed no-brainer that some women somehow manage to miss.

3. If he doesn't respect her personal boundaries. The lack of respect shows how little he cares for her and may indicate a controlling and abusive personality.

4. If he steals or borrows money or items and doesn't repay or return as promised or in the same or better condition than they were loaned. Not only is he a thief or a mooch, he is unlikely to stand by bigger promises. Appropriating or damaging her material possessions without reparation may be a sign he's a financial abuser especially if he denies her access to her own property or refuses to return the favor of the loan.

5. If he exhibits cruelty to animals. Not only is it harmful for the poor animal, it is an indication that he's likely to treat her and her children badly when she doesn't do as he wants.

6. If he doesn't like her friends and refuses to spend as much time with them as he expects her to spend with his friends. Such isolation is an aspect of control and abuse.

7. If he uses emotional blackmail or other methods of coercion or intimidation to induce fear, or attempts to "pull rank" in order to get his way. That is, as a self-proclaimed superior male, he presumes to know what's best for a female. These are some of the controlling tactics of an abuser.

8. If he acts badly and denies it or blames her for it. Was she holding a gun to his head or a knife to his throat? No, this type of lack of respect is verbal, psychological, or physical abuse. If he demeans her to others or humiliates her, it is a symptom of his own low self-esteem. Since verbal abuse is often a precursor to physical abuse and since abusers are notoriously low on self-esteem, "One strike, he's out," helps women avoid wasting any more time on abusive men.

9. If he's unduly competitive with her. When a man loves a woman, he helps her be the best she can. Striving to beat her instead of helping her to improve is a sign of his low self-esteem and is only a precursor of the many future power struggles between them. Watch this one, too, because there are critics who claim they're only trying to help when, in fact, they're bruising souls and crushing spirits. Adept criticism will mention positive qualities as much or more than any negative points and will convey how to make something better without putting her or her effort down.

10. For a Christian, if he won't go to church with her and discourages her from attending. This marks a self-centered man who wants a woman in his life but doesn't want to be in hers. If he belittles her belief in God, she may be looking at a power and control freak and an abuser. In any case, a man who isn't yielded to the Lord makes married life harder on the Christian woman, and vice versa, which is one of the reasons why the Bible exhorts us to marry only another believer.

11. When the still, small "voice" of the Holy Spirit of God disturbs her spirit and soul. Since God knows everything, He may warn her away from a bad relationship so she doesn't have to experience any of the above.

So, for behavior like the examples above, it's "Strike one! He's out...Next!" because abuse is never an accident nor is it a one-time occurrence. It is a set of reprehensible methods chosen by abusers to get what they want.

And, yes, there are women who abuse men.

Tips From "The Happening"

M. Night Shyamalan's film, "The Happening" starring Mark Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel, has been showing on HBO. With preparedness on my mind this month, I gleaned the following tips from the movie:

- Firearms will harm you and others. Avoid people who have them and don't carry one yourself.

Although, having one or more weapons for self-protection is debatable.

- Keep an emergency bag near you at home, in your car, and at work especially if you walk or use public transportation.

A few items should be readily accessible at all times. Build your own Everyday Carry (EDC) kit to keep in your purse, briefcase, or backpack. A 32 oz/1 L wide-mouth water bottle will hold several of the larger items and a key chain will hold the small stuff.

- Keeping your mind occupied will avert panic attacks.

Solve puzzles, play games, swap stories with others, sing.

- Backpacks and duffel bags are easier for going over rougher terrain than are rolling suitcases.

- Don't yammer at the person you're looking to for guidance. Be quiet and let him/her think!

- There's safety in numbers...except when it's safer to be away from the crowd.

Every situation is different from the next; maybe a little bit, maybe a lot. If what you should do isn't clear, unlike being on something that's in the process of collapsing under the combined weight of a crowd, pray for God's guidance - He knows what's best. Pray, anyway. It never hurts.

- Have maps for where you are and for where you're going. What if there wasn't a vehicle or it didn't have the map they needed?

- Respect other people's property.

If you don't leave when told, you are trespassing and some (all?) states permit the use of deadly force against trespassers to protect the occupant(s) and property.

- Keep a positive attitude.

A final tip that wasn't given:

An exposure kit (N95 mask or at least a bandanna, goggles, gloves, and protective clothing such as a cheap plastic rain suit) might have protected them from the toxins.

That had to be ignored, of course, or the movie would have been different than it was.

Your Life Story

About ten years ago, I encouraged a former co-worker to encourage her parents to write down their life stories as a heritage for her and her daughter because they lived through times and experienced events that we never will such as World War II.

Now, it's time for us to start doing the same because even ordinary life has details that future generations won't comprehend unless we leave a record of what it's like for us.

For example, what was air travel like before the TSA and 3-1-1 bags?

Do you remember where you were and what you felt when you learned about the assassination of JFK, the Oklahoma City bombing, or the events of 9-11?

How did you connect with your friends before email, cell phones, and text messaging?

What was it like listening to music before you got your first iPod or MP3 player?

How did you spend your time before Facebook, Twitter, "NCIS" reruns, and LOLcats?

Do you attend noodle rolling gatherings at church? What is noodle rolling?!

What were your favorite pet(s) and other memorable animals?

Did you meet and fall in love online or in real life?

What were the joys and pain, hopes and fears you experienced on the birth of each of your children?

And, how did you spend your summer vacations?!

For Christians, our life stories are testimonies of God's faithfulness.

This was confirmed last night when my friend brought it up during our dinner together. "That's interesting," I commented. "Just last week, I was thinking that I should encourage my blog readers to write their life stories."

"But, Gail, I'm not a writer," she said. "Will you help me?"

"Sure, in a limited way," I replied. While I won't do any of her writing for her, there are tips I didn't hesitate to share:

1. Don't worry about grammar. Write conversationally as though you are talking to your best friend or a close relative.

2. Read aloud what you wrote because hearing your story is the best way to catch awkward-sounding passages so you may improve them.

3. Don't worry about sequence. If you make each vignette a separate file using the format of Topic-MonthYear.doc for the filename, it'll be easy to organize them into chronological order or by topic after you're finished writing them and when you're ready to collate them to make the first draft of your book.

4. Back up, back up, BACK UP! because recreating something from scratch is agony. Trust me on this!!! If you don't already have an external hard drive, get a USB drive, burn your files to a rewriteable CD or DVD, upload them to a cloud storage site and/or email a copy to yourself, and print out a hardcopy of each file and store them in a 3-ring binder where it, not only will serve as a primitive backup, but will also be easier to review and redline when you want to change something.

5. Double-space when you type so that there's room to redline when you proofread and edit. Generous margins will also help. I recommend that you set the top and bottom margins at 1" and set the side margins at 1.5" which will also provide room for the holes needed by the binder rings.

6. Thoughts about what you should write about will flit in and out of your mind while you go about your daily business. Keep index cards or a steno notebook or anything similar at hand to jot down a reminder of these thoughts. Perhaps, a small hand-held tape recorder will be easier. Debbie Roome's article, "How to Write Your Life Story" has a list of topics you may want to address.

7. After everything's written and organized by chronology or topic, reread it with an eye for a recurring theme or something you may use to compose the opening and conclusion that may be either a summary or a look toward the future.

8. Set the first draft aside for 6-12 months so you may return to it with fresh eyes to polish it.

9. Rinse and repeat. That is, after your second draft, take a shorter, 3-6 months, break from it before returning to polish it into your third draft.

10. Finally, keep a journal because your life story is a continuing saga that won't end until the day you die. Add to your autobiography as your life unfolds using your journal as your rough draft for the new material until you feel you've conveyed all the lessons you've learned and described all the places to which you've traveled and the interesting people you've known.

Please share your dreams and goals, joys and disappointments, and let your descendants get to know you and the life you have instead of letting the evidence of your existence and the lessons you've learned disappear through time leaving only your genes and your name behind.

Write on!

The Strength of a Woman

The flux of 007 movies on the USA network that started over the Independence Day weekend led me to think about, not my favorite James Bond actors (Pierce Brosnan and Daniel Craig), but my favorite Bond women (portrayed by Carole Bouquet, Judi Dench, Halle Berry, and Michelle Yeoh) and why. It's because they are determined and have their own missions in the war of good versus evil.

This led me to think about the roles of men and women in society, how some cultures recognize women's voices in councils while others relegate women solely to domestic duties to the aboriginal tribe that reversed the traditional stereotypical roles to the point that the men breast-fed the babies.

Here in the United States of America, great progress has been made toward recognizing women's abilities in fields as diverse as politics, business, and the military; capable in all fields as proven by history and supported by the Bible.

In fact, it is a shame for those who call themselves "Christians" to relegate women strictly to the traditional role of homemaker when the Bible tells us by example that women can do anything.

In Deborah, a prophetess and judge over all Israel, we see a spiritual and national leader (Judges 4:4). In Jael, we see an assassin (Judges 4:21). Huldah was a prophetess who men, even a priest, consulted for God's advice (2 Kings 22:14) and the Proverbs 31 woman is a land owner who also has a cottage industry.

Jumping into the New Testament, we find Lydia the merchant (Acts 16:14), Phebe the deaconess (Romans 16:1), Junia the apostle (Romans 16:7), and may read Paul's instructions about women preaching (1 Corinthians 11:5-6, 15).

There are more, but having enough examples to level that particular playing field, we're free to take another look at the question: What is the role of a woman?

Shedding light on this question was the discovery by a former team leader of mine who, expecting her first child and reading child development books, was dismayed upon learning that a child's personality is basically set by age five.

"I have only five years to mold this child!" she exclaimed. "I thought I'd get at least 10 years. I was hoping for more time, not less!"

Therein is the strength of a woman. As far as biological, survival-of-the-species purposes go, while a man's upper body strength makes it easier for him to provide for and protect his family by sheer physical strength, it is for the present and short-term future. For women, the division of labor is much more significant than the immediate care demanded by diapers, snotty noses, and drudgery that is too often held in low esteem by men and even by many women themselves.

If we look beyond that, we'd see that God also entrusted women with the long-term future by enabling them to teach a child from birth and breast, to instill foundational values while the child still clings to the mother's knee, values that may be passed on to future generations and effect changes for the better just as we've experienced through the history of the U.S.

My hope is that women around the world draw upon their strength and advantage to make the war of good versus evil their personal mission for the adage is true: "The hand that rocks the cradle, rules the world."

Evangeline

With all the beautiful dogs appearing at the 133rd Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show on Monday and Tuesday, it was easy for me to anticipate my blogging about dogs this week. However, in the midst of my remembering the dogs I've known, I learned that my favorite aunt, my mother's older sister, passed away this past Sunday night.

Our relationship wasn't typical, being stunted by the thousands of miles that usually separated us and by the sometimes intense feelings of rivalry expressed by my mother that I came to believe were the result of their father asking Mom, why couldn't she be more like Evangeline? Eventually, Mom couldn't overcome her personal demons that persuaded her to refuse all contact with her sister despite Evangeline's many attempts to reconcile.

Fortunately, before Mom got to her last straw, Auntie and I already had a relationship that Mom didn't later discourage. Mom was smart and knew that whatever resentment she held was not to be borne by me as well. Because of this, Auntie has the honor of being the pivot point for three key aspects of my life: photography, travel, and my relationship with the Lord.

Her influence on my photography was possibly inadvertent. Before her husband was transferred from wherever he was stationed in Germany, Auntie sent a Konica 35mm rangefinder camera to Mom who, after using it for a while, decided it was too complicated for her and passed it along to me. Being an avid shutterbug since before I received my first camera at age 12, receiving a 35mm camera when I was 16 was a happy event for me. I wore out the camera over the next five years and the practice proved invaluable. When I was 21, I was asked to do the publicity shots for a stage play that were published in the local newspaper.

Auntie's influence on my traveling came from a brief conversation at the Honolulu International Airport's baggage claim area. Instructed by Mom to help Evan with her luggage, I was surprised when she pulled a small suitcase from the carousel and began to walk toward the exit with it.

"What about your other suitcase?" I asked.

"I don't have another suitcase. This is it," Auntie replied.

My jaw dropped. Mom always had Dad call the airline to ask the limits for the free luggage allowance so she could pack to the max, taking advantage of Dad's taking only one suitcase for himself to add to her travel wardrobe and mine. From Mom's example, I thought women were supposed to have a four-piece matched set of luggage because they needed it for all the toiletries and clothing they had to take.

"Only one suitcase?" I was amazed. Evan didn't even have a carry-on bag, only her purse.

"I travel with other women from the office and need to be able to carry my own luggage," she said. "I have two pairs of slacks, four blouses, and a couple of changes of underwear. That's all I need."

That eye-opener enabled me to spend five days on Puerto Rico and St. Croix with only my purse, camera, and carry-on bag, and two weeks in Hawai`i with a garment bag instead of the carry-on. For a two-week road trip to the Apostle Islands National Lakeshore in Wisconsin, Voyageurs National Park in Minnesota, the Royal Canadian Mint in Winnipeg, Manitoba; the Eisenhower Presidential Library and Museum in Abilene, Kansas and seeing a few friends along the way, I took my camera, laptop, and carry-on bag.

Aunt Evan also helped me learn that, although you can't always trust people, you can always trust God, by serving as His oracle during one visit we enjoyed after she retired and went to live with her son on the Big Island of Hawai`i. She said that she doesn't get the things that people ask her to bring back for them from her trips. I knew I was hearing significant advice although I was choosing not to heed it. After all, it was a good friend from college who had asked me to bring back a T-shirt and we had continued the relationship for over ten years. I trusted my friend to repay me.

When I returned home, I called the now-former-friend who said she had changed her mind. She refused to pay me for the T-shirt as she had promised, telling me to send it back to Honolulu to get my money back. (I kept it for a while, so I wouldn't forget the valuable lesson. And, although that single incident didn't break up our friendship at that time, it was a definite cooler, a wake-up call to the type of person she is.)

Auntie was sociable, vivacious, and petite like a little bird with sparkling eyes. Being with her wasn't always sunshine and roses, however. There were times we disagreed, our voices rising as the current argument heated. As we approached impasse, she had the wisdom to pause and ask, "But, we agree that Jesus Christ is Lord?" I'd say, "Yes," and we'd laugh, the tension broken and melted away.

I could write more, how her name came from the poem, "Evangeline: A Tale of Acadie" by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow or how she was a street preacher when she was only ten. I recall that she had cars that were "different." Hers were the first Volkswagen Beetle and Opel in which I ever rode.

I'll miss her. I'm not in mourning or sad because there are no unresolved issues between us. The last words we said to one another were, "I love you." I don't need to say, "Good-bye," to her because I know in my heart, in my gut, in the very core of my being, that I'll see her again some day.

In the meantime, I hope her spirit has a nice nap. After 96 years on this earth, I expect she probably needs the rest.

1 Thessalonians 4:
13. But I would not have you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning them which are asleep, that ye sorrow not, even as others which have no hope.
14. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so them also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him.
15. For this we say unto you by the word of the Lord, that we which are alive and remain unto the coming of the Lord shall not prevent them which are asleep.
16. For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first:
17. Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.

A Reminder

Now that the elections are over, many are deeply disappointed or maybe even angry that their candidates lost while others are elated that their candidates won.

This reminder is for us Christians because whoever our leaders are, whether we agree with them or not, we are called to pray for them and all others in positions of authority:

1 Timothy 2:
1. I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men;
2. For kings, and for all that are in authority; that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and honesty.
3. For this is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Saviour;
4. Who will have all men to be saved, and to come unto the knowledge of the truth.

That's what it was all about, wasn't it? Didn't we vote the way that we did because we want quiet and peaceable lives and thought the candidates for whom we voted had the better ideas for our getting them? Or maybe we voted the way that we did because we're so soft and desperate to reach the pie in the sky that we have to have the easy way out no matter what it costs us over the long term.

Personally, I'm not so sure about the godliness and honesty part because I know enough "Christians" who don't read their Bibles, preferring to follow the popular speaker of the year who usually says what sounds good, perverting the message of the Bible. They're not godly or honest because they don't want to take responsibility for what they believe. They're not real Christians because the word "Christian" means "a follower of Christ" (Acts 11:26). However, it's possible that they're baby Christians who simply don't know any better. For the others who aren't newly born-again, since listening to false leaders is a lot easier, that's what they do. They let the deceivers mute their consciousnesses and feed their greediness for personal gain instead of heeding good leaders who encourage us to pray and know the Word for ourselves, as Christ did, as they do themselves.

Living My Dream

It hit me on Sunday. I'm living my dream come true.

I've been so busy, adding this blog to my busy-ness, that it didn't occur to me earlier.

Sparing you the details, two doctors told me in the latter part of 1992 that I had to find another line of work. After discussing it with my immediate circle as well as with counselors, after considering what I might do, with or without additional training or education, only my desire called out to God: All I want to do is write.

The year 1992 passed into 1993. I wasn't able to work for a year and was limited in my capabilities when I returned to the office. Continued pain and additional therapy filled my thoughts and my days, months, even years. I thought I'd never see the end of it although I tried to keep smiling. I was, and still am, so grateful for anyone who was kind to me and everyone who made me laugh.

Then, it happened. I was free to concentrate on my writing and forgot the rest. That's what dreams do. They take you away from real life to another world, another place, another time, another life, until you see how dreams and real life are interrelated. Until you're able to realize, as I did on Sunday, that real life is the dream and how much God has blessed us.

Psalms 34:8. O taste and see that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him.

Lamentations 3:25. The Lord is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him.

Psalms 100:5. For the Lord is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.

Thank You, Lord!